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Open Post: Hosted By The Farmer’s Tan On Chris Pratt’s Ass
Chris Pratt recently married Katherine Schwarzenegger after one year together and they honeymooned in Hawaii. They’re obviously so in love that Chris was too busy staring into her eyes to remember to...
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Open Post: Hosted By Jeremy Renner’s Dreams Of Rock Stardom Coming True
I can’t believe all this fussin’ and cussin’ over Taylor Swift’s masters is going on right now when there’s an entire catalog of Jeremy Renner certified bangers right there for the taking. Everybody’s...
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Open Post: Hosted By Miley Cyrus’ Video For “Mother’s Daughter”
Miley Cyrus is fighting to show you how socially aware she is. Her dad, Billy Ray Cyrus is out here helping gay black guys get to #1 on the charts, while she’s still apologizing for picking up and...
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Open Post: Hosted By The Ice Cream Truck Owner Who’s Making Influencers Pay...
In fights I did not see coming an ice cream truck owner is fighting with social media influencers. He’s calling them gross and letting them know that they have to pay for their ice cream like the rest...
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Happy Fourth Of July From Joey Chestnut Training For Another Wiener Gobbling Win
On the Fourth of July, it’s a day of rest for many, but not for Joey Chestnut’s insides who spend part of the day screaming MERCY! as he swallows down more wieners and eats more buns than a circuit...
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Open Post: Hosted By Pabst’s New Coffee Beer Drink
Pabst Blue Ribbon has taken two great things, coffee and beer, and combined them together to make one gross thing. I guess ruining individual great things is America’s new favorite pass time. Heinz...
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Open Post: Hosted By Cardi B Wanting Her Wig Back
Cardi B was headlining the Wireless Festival in London last night when she got so into her performance that she snatched her own wig and threw it into the crowd. Pandemonium broke out. Seriously, you...
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Open Post: Hosted By This Beautiful Statue Of Melania Trump
The reincarnation of Jackie O has become so famous and important that she’s inspired art. First Lady Melania Trump is now a wooden statue overlooking her Slovenian hometown of Sevnica. Unfortunately,...
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Open Post: Hosted By Justin Bieber Losing To Mariah Carey In The Bottle Cap...
Another year, another viral internet “challenge” has been ruined by Justin Bieber. Over the past few years, Justin’s participated in the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge (after it had already been won by...
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Open Post: Hosted By Lindsay Lohan Teasing A Snippet Of Her New Music On...
It’s not Lindsay Lohan’s birthday anymore but it’s somebody’s birthday so Lindsay is offering up her flesh once again in celebration of life. Lindsay posted a series of tasteful almost nudes on...
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Open Post: Hosted By A Man And His Cat Named Spaghetti Who Both Wore Unusual...
If you pull up to your house to find somebody has left a bottle of cider and a bunch of ceremonial knives on top of your car, the obvious conclusion is that there is probably a cat wearing a t-shirt...
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Open Post: Hosted By The Criminal Who Got Caught Because Of A Fart
The Kansas City Star says that there is one less criminal, a real smooth criminal, on the streets, and he was done in by his own fart. Yes, a man who was running from the 5-0 and hid in the woods...
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Open Post: Hosted By A Box Of Crusts Being Sold By A New Jersey Pizza Chain
First of all, pizza is life! Secondly, the crust is the prize you get after ingesting thousands of calories worth of cheese and grease. And lastly, anyone who doesn’t adhere to these rules needs to be...
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Open Post: Hosted By The Marijuna Cake That Got A Dairy Queen Employee Fired
It was a simple mistake, really. It could have happened to almost anyone. But it did happen to one Cassandra Walker, a Dairy Queen employee who was unjustly fired for creating that beautiful...
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Open Post: Hosted By The “Doorknob” A Woman Claims She Found In Her Taco Bell
Fox5NY says that Eve Saint of Fishkill, New York is not amused. First of all, the Taco Bell resort sold out in two minutes, so she can’t even fucking stay the night–she had to get an Airbnb in Palm...
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Open Post: Hosted By Pottery Barn’s “Friends” Collection
Last week, it was announced that Friends is leaving Netflix for HBO Max, and that subsequently created a real-life Friends episode called The One Where A Whole Lot Of People Sign Up For An HBO Max...
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Open Post: Hosted By Twinkies Cereal, Which May Become An Actual Thing
I’m glad to see that cereal companies don’t give a single fuck about the rise of childhood diabetes in the world–as it’s being reported by Food & Wine that a new cereal is on the horizon. Twinkies...
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Open Post: Hosted By Jadakiss’ Pizza-Less Pizza
Remember how we told you about the slice made entirely of pizza crusts being sold at an Italian restaurant in New Jersey? Well, here’s a pizza with everything in the middle cut out leaving exclusively...
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Open Post: Hosted By The Return Of Miley Cyrus’ Twerking Skills
It’s been a while since Miley Cyrus served up a short stack of unlimited pancakes. After she desperately dumped dirt onto Hannah Montana’s grave by pressing her butt cheeks against Robin Thicke on...
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Open Post: Hosted By “Batuka”, Madonna’s Latest Madame X Video
Even though Big Little Lies probably won’t be getting a third season (thank God), somebody forgot to tell Madonna. Maybe she gets really crappy cell reception in Portugal because she clearly did not...
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