Open Post: Hosted By Keanu Reeves Leaving His New Catchphrase On A Fan’s Lawn
Keanu Reeves seems like the nicest man in Hollywood. And you never read about him doing anything stupid except sitting sadly on benches which is stupid of him because he’s so beloved. Keanu’s new...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By Gritty The Lifeguard
Philadelphia Flyers mascot and former HSOTD Gritty needed a summer job because you don’t play hockey when it’s (literally) 100° out. So he got one as a lifeguard in the Stranger Things universe, as...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By Shawn Mendes’ New Butterfly Tattoo
Capital FM reports that Shawn Mendes was DMing a fan. No, he wasn’t stepping out on his 100% authentic and truly meaningful relationship with Camila Cabello. Shawn was DMing his fan because she posted...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By John Oliver Confirming Beyonce Was Photoshopped Into...
Although the reviews haven’t been great, the live-action The Lion King is a certified hit. More than likely because Beyonce‘s loyal stable of unstable crazies, the BeyHive, bought all the tickets and...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By The “Happy Birthday Loser” Cake For A Two-Year-Old
People reports that the cake drama keeps rolling. Last time it was the Moana/Marijuana mix-up that kept us amused at the everyday ridiculousness of life. But today we take it a step further. Here is...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By The Answer To The Biggest Mystery Of This Generation!
Yesterday’s Hot Slut of the Day was a lone Double Double from In-N-Out that was found on a street in Jamaica, Queens in NYC, hundreds of miles away from the nearest Emporium of Heavenly Delicious...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By Jennifer Lopez’s $10,000 24-Karat Gold 50th Birthday Cake
Jennifer Lopez turned 50 on Wednesday night, and she celebrated in a totally low-key way by having a little dinner at Denny’s with A-Rod and her kids where she got a free meal because it was her...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By “Designing Women” Coming To Hulu!
Prepare to relive the night that the lights went out in JOR-JAH! Deadline says that Designing Women is coming to Hulu (and I’m not talking the reboot that’s been talked about for eons)! I’m talking...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By The Las Vegas Grasshopper Invasion Of 2019
This is some biblical shit. Swarms of insects invading the City of Sin? Get out of the casinos and the strip clubs and flee for the border before you all turn into pillars of salt or burning bushes!...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By Some Of The “Real Housewives” Paying Tribute To Plastic...
I can’t stand when celebrities pretend they’ve never had plastic surgery before. Like we’re all so dumb not to realize your face hasn’t moved since the 90s? Hell, most celebrities can’t pass by the...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By Baby Shark Cereal
In case your mornings weren’t going good enough, Kellogg’s has decided to bless you by taking a beautiful and meaningful song (Baby Shark Doo Doo Doo!) and turning it into a healthy and nutritious...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By Marty The Grocery Store Robot That Does Basically Nothing
Mashable reports there’s been more progress in the robotic takeover. Drones that deliver food and brain chips that turn us into computers have a new ally in the battle to overthrow humanity: Marty The...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By French’s Mustard Ice Cream
If you like mustard and you like ice cream, and more importantly like combining two things that have no business being combined, then French’s and Coolhaus have made all your sick fantasies come true...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By The Oscar Mayer Hot Dog Ice Cream Sandwich
The American ice cream industry is having a gross-off and we are all losing. Yesterday I wrote about French’s having a moment of ice cream WTFness by inventing a mustard flavored ice cream. Not to be...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By This Ketchup Thief’s Redemption
One of the few things I’ve ever stolen in my life besides the hearts and minds of the Dlisted audience (*cringe*) was a life-size cut-out of the Kool-Aid Man from a Burger King in South Weymouth,...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By The 92-Year-Old Who Broke A World Sprinting Record And...
How was 92-year-old Diane Hoffman able to break multiple world sprinting records last weekend? “I believe the good lord gave me legs! That’s it! Nothing else!” Oh Diane! The New York Post reports that...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By The Brazilian Gang Leader Who Tried To Bust Out Of...
A Brazilian gang leader tried to bust out of prison by dressing up as his 19-year-old daughter, thinking he could just walk out of there. This gang leader has obviously seen Mrs. Doubtfire too many...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By Fingerless Croc Gloves
That guttural, anguished scream of abject disgust that woke you up out of a dead sleep this morning was not a dream. That shit was real as fuck and it came from Michael K’s house when he opened his...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By The Emoji House Of Revenge
A Manhattan Beach, CA homeowner is proving to be %100 percent THAT emoji-loving bitch by painting her house bright pink with two giant emojis on it after a neighbor snitched on her for using her house...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By Post Malone’s Bud Light-Inspired Fashion Line
Post Malone has come out with a crazy expensive Bud Light fashion collection, including $250 jeans with the words Bud Light written all over them and $85 sweat pants with the same print. So I know...
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