Open Post: Hosted By KFC’s Pickle Fried Chicken
2018 is turning into the Year of the Pickle. History’s most famous pickle slut Snooki is back on TV, Sonic created something the Vlasic stork would shit out if he got butt boned by a snowman, and now...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By Lil’ Kim Pulling A Mariah When Asked About Nicki Minaj
Mariah Carey may have decent royalty checks from all ‘dem hits. But she really missed her pot of gold by not hopping in a cab to the trademark office to file a patent for “I don’t know her”...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By The Phillies Fan Who Took A Hot Dog To The Face
Ok, fair warning – the moment of impact isn’t shown by Inside Edition (via HuffPost). It’s understandable, because the victim of the Philly Phanatic’s hot dog blast is a lady who looks like everyone’s...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By This Gay Couple In Hong Kong Sexin’ For The Public
The pressure to perform alone! This video, via Instinct, of a gay couple in Hong Kong banging for the horny masses, has gone viral. Jesus, some of us can barely do it with the lights on and these two...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By Zsa Zsa, The New “World’s Ugliest Dog”
There’s all sorts of ugly shit in the world right now. But each year, we can always count on the dog community to say, “You wanna see ugly? Take a look at this balding subway rat masquerading as a...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By The Sheila E. Of Fat Pussies
It’s a shitty shame that Keyboard Cat II still isn’t with us, because if he was, then he could hook up with Canta Cat and Drummer Cat, and the three would form the greatest musical trio since The...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By Bootleg Robert Redford And A Freshly Bathed Leonardo...
Sharon Tate’s sister just found a new favorite picture to wipe her post-shit ass with…. The Quentin Tarantino Manson Murders movie, that nobody but those involved want, is currently shooting in Los...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By Tom Brady Coming Out As An Ass Eater
Barstool Sports posted this picture on their Instagram yesterday of one hungry, hungry hippo earning its PhD in Butt Munching by swallowing that ass cheek up. Or maybe that hippo is a political...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By The Sad Final Picture Of Geoffrey The Giraffe Leaving...
It should be a great weekend for those who are looking forward to celebrating all the booze and hot dogs that Canada Day and Independence Day have to offer. Sadly, it looks like the same can’t be said...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By Pebbles Vs. Henny Penny
For once in “Open Post” animal battle history, the two competitors seem almost evenly matched. YouTube channel CatersClips brings us the epic battle between Pebbles the brave kid goat and Henny Penny...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By Mama June In A One-Piece
Former messy reality TV sweetheart turned societal outcast (for VERY good reasons) “Mama June” Shannon lost some weight, as you probably know if you watched her latest reality shit show Mama June:...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By The Beautification Of Saint George
Some folks in Spain are fired up over the recent restoration of a 16th century statue of San Jorge (Saint George), a dragon slaying knight. St. George has been living in the Church of St. Michael in...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By A PSA For The Obvious
Some say that humans are the dumbest species to roam the land (which I can’t totally co-sign since we did invent Jell-O 1-2-3), but we are born with some natural instincts. Like we know that if we...
View ArticleHappy Fourth From Joey Chestnut Hoovering Down 72 Hot Dogs
On nearly every Fourth of July for over a decade, Joey Chestnut has been my idol, because he gets to open up his mouth and gobble down wiener after wiener. I can’t even get one wiener to want to be...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By Red, White, Blue And Ginger Elegance
“I’ve never been truly proud of creating the American flag until I saw this gorgeous picture,” said the ghost of Betsy Ross, or whoever is responsible for the American flag. You know that fireworks...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By A Man Who Doesn’t Understand How Pants Work
Two minutes and four seconds doesn’t sound like a very long time. Even if you’re enduring something horrible, like getting your teeth cleaned or watching Donald Trump speak, you know that if you only...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By Brit Brit Spears Serenading Us With A Soothing Rendition...
If nothing soothes your eardrums like the sound of a Chipette with a head cold screeching out a wail of pain while getting surgery without anesthesia after doing helium in a bathroom, then this...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By A Greedy Chipmunk Stuffing Nut After Nut Into His Mouth
File that headline under: A Title Found In The Animal Kingdom’s Version Of PornHub. A human in the town of Aurora in Ontario, Canada took a video of a wild chipmunk they named Van Gogh (because of his...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By Raven-Symone Reacting To Orlando Brown’s Tattoo Of Her Face
Orlando Brown has been through it recently. And by ‘it’ I mean some kind of a heavy drug-induced psychosis. After being ignored for the That’s So Raven reboot because he thought Raven-Symone was still...
View ArticleOpen Post: Hosted By Gain Detergent Outing Themselves As Having A Jockstrap...
Either the clueless straights behind this Gain commercial don’t know what a jockstrap fetish is or they do know what a jockstrap fetish is and decided that they needed some attention. I’m going with...
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