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Open Post: Hosted By The Ten Most Hated Christmas Candies In America
Think Big Candy hasn’t gone too far? Think again. Let’s pretend for a minute that Christmas candy is a thing. Like, make-believe that Halloween candy and Christmas cookies don’t exist and the only...
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Open Post: Hosted By Subway’s Limited-Edition Footlong Cookies
Everyone knows the sandwiches at Subway are absolutely subpar. They’re basically lettuce mountains with extra bread, a little bit of meat and a whisper of cheese. Yummy! However, their cookies are the...
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Open Post: Hosted By Hellmann’s Asking You To Put Mayo In Your Eggnog
Hot on the hells (typo and it stays) of Lindsay Lohan and Pepsi trying to make Milk Pepsi happen (very fetch), Hellmann’s have come up with their own holiday abomination. If you thought your eggnog...
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Open Post: Hosted By The “Reckless Driver” Dog Of Texas
We’ve all been involved in some sort of fender bender. Usually, the person at fault is a distracted driver who’s on the phone or is eating a McMuffin with one hand and holding jumbo 7-11 coffee in the...
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Open Post: Hosted By The Mom Who Saved Her Daughter From A Raccoon Attack
I live in Toronto, where raccoons outnumber people 5 to 1* (a la New Zealanders and sheep), and so far, I haven’t had any negative experiences. Most of the raccoons are just cute lil’ garbage-eatin’...
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Open Post: Hosted By The Dog Who Gets “Hyped” To Leave A Boarding Kennel...
If you’re an emotionally needy dog, you get your own support dog. If you’re a dog who feels compelled to do hood rat stuff, you take your grandma’s car for a joyride and crash that bitch into anything...
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Open Post: Hosted By Kathy Hilton Reapplying Her Lipstick On Stage During...
Anyone who’d been under the impression that Kathy Hilton’s awkward, dim, and out-of-touch rich lady antics were reserved for her quirky and dysfunctional The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills persona...
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Open Post: Hosted By The Man Who Botoxed His Butthole
Many people think that Botox injections can only work at tightening up your face, but did you know it apparently also does wonders for tightening up that booty? Yeah, that was a weird sentence to type...
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Open Post: Hosted By IHOP’s Mini Pancake Cereal
Have you ever woken up in the morning and said to yourself, “Should I have pancakes or cereal for breakfast?” Well, Christmas has come early because now you can have both. The mini pancake cereal...
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Open Post: Hosted By The Website That Got Roasted For Saying Hilary Duff...
I’m sorry to report this news to anyone over 30, but the entertainment website The Daily Loud thinks you’re close to death. If you’ve managed to make it past this age and not have evaporated into...
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Open Post: Hosted By Katie Holmes’ Y2K Look
It’s happening. My nightmare is coming true: the 2000s fashion craze is taking hold. A combination of Gen Z-ers stumbling upon reruns of The OC and fashion houses running out of ideas has led to this...
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Open Post: Hosted By Lady Gaga Doing The “Bloody Wednesday” Challenge On TikTok
The “Bloody Wednesday” challenge, where TikTokers attempt to recreate Jenna Ortega’s deadpan dance sequence from Netflix’s smash show, Wednesday, has been obnoxiously overrunning feeds for a bit now....
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Open Post: Hosted By A Necklace Made From Drake’s Collection Of Unused...
I think we can now safely call Drake a “confirmed bachelor” without anybody getting bent out of shape about the historical implications of that designation since Drake himself is the one going out of...
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Open Post: Hosted By Jennifer Aniston’s Holiday Party For The “Old Guard Of...
Unlike most people who have parties and post everything from their first guest arriving to when they’re drunkenly placed in an Uber, Jennifer Aniston prefers to keep things a little more private. This...
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Open Post: Hosted By Ariana Grande Asking Jennifer Coolidge About The “Best...
Career-wise, Jennifer Coolidge has had a really great couple of years, thanks to The White Lotus. I cannot say the same about her personal life because I do not know her personally. But guess who...
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Open Post: Hosted By The Arizona Driver Who Got A Ticket For Trying To Drive...
‘Tis the point of the holiday season where people start losing their gat damn minds as they race around town trying to track down the best sale on prime rib or get their hands on that ridiculous...
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Open Post: Hosted By A Border Collie Doing A Trust Fall
Growing up, one of my uncle’s favorite whimsical pieces of advice was, “Never EVER trust anyone.” His simple, consistent message over the years definitely didn’t have any effect on me and my...
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Open Post: Hosted By The Time “The Great British Bake Off’s” Prue Leith Had...
One of my greatest fears outside of the mortifying ordeal of being known is being lost at sea. I’ve never seen Jaws, but I’m convinced I’d be a sunburnt meal for some hungry great whites. Hence why I...
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Open Post: Hosted By James Cameron’s Scientific Study To Prove Jack Couldn’t...
JACK DAWSON IS DEAD. He froze to death in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean in the wee hours of April 15, 2012, following the Titanic’s sinking. The question is… did Jack (Leonardo DiCaprio) have to...
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Open Post: Hosted By Ina Garten’s Skepticism Of The Significance Of Bay Leaves
When Ina Garten isn’t fielding steamy texts from her husband Jeffrey Garten, she’s Cooking For Jeffrey. Ina loves to host dinner parties for negligible-to-most reasons to celebrate–like the 37th...
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