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Open Post: Hosted By Too Much Glamour For One Picture

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openpostalvesandsophia

One second after that picture was taken, the baldie in the poster on the door spit out his cigar after he blew all the loads in his balls from being so close to such elegance.

The camera lenses of the paparazzi in Germany have it so much better than the camera lenses of the paparazzi here in the US. The pap lenses here practically fall asleep every time they have to get a picture of a human drool stain (like the Jenners, the Kartrashians, the Hadids, etc..) in ugly clothes, while in Germany, the pap lenses tingle from taking in the orgasm-inducing sophistication of Harald Glööckler, Micaela Schäfer and Sophia Vegas! 18 years ago (I’m guessing that Sophia is 18), two delicate faeries bareback boned on top of a delicate rosebud in a field in Germany somewhere, and after one of the faeries busted an ethereal nut on the rosebud, it bloomed into the gorgeous blossom we know as Sophia Vegas. Sophia is a “reality star” in Germany, the ex-wife of a German brothel owner, and more importantly a friend of Brazilian diamond The Human Doll (government ID name: Rodrigo Alves).

Last night, the people of Cologne in Germany got as close as they’ll ever get to two sparkling stars in the sky when Sophia and The Human Ken Doll hit the stroll before going into a restaurant. While they were inside of the restaurant celebrating the fact that they’re two of the most glamorous beings that ever lived, The Human Ken Doll’s plastic surgeon somberly told their family, “I’m sorry, but things are going to be a little strapped around here lately.” Because The Human Ken Doll claims that after spending almost a quarter of a million dollar on 60 plastic surgeries, he’s done. He said this to The Daily Mail:

“I have to stop with plastic surgery. There is nothing else that can be changed without compromising my health. Having 60 surgeries, including face and neck lifts, pectoral implants and 4 ribs removed is enough. Now, I will only have any more surgery for health reasons or when I get much older.”

I know, your mouth is open with shock, because you can’t believe he’s had any plastic surgery!

And here’s more of Sophia Vegas looking like my favorite Rock Of Love Bus contestant who never was, and The Human Ken Doll giving you pin-up Grinch in a corset glamour.

Pics: Wenn.com


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