Yogi Bear and that little bitch Boo-Boo can get fucked. NPR reports that there’s a brand new bumbling sustenance-stealer on the scene! Introducing Hank the Tank, the 500-pound black bear who’s broken into at least 28 South Lake Tahoe homes in a never-ending quest for food. The California Department of Fish and Wildlife explains that Hank is a “severely food-habituated bear,” meaning he’s not afraid of people and he associates them with access to food. They say that Hank uses his “immense size and strength” to break into houses through front doors and garage doors. Ah, the Kool-Aid Man method. I know it well.
California’s wildlife agency says that Hank is responsible for “152 reports of conflict behavior.” His most recent break-in was last week when police were called to a home on Catalina Drive. Hank was inside the house, sniffin’ around for food. He’d busted down a wooden fence, broken a window, and somehow squeezed his chubby body through that small opening. Cops showed up and banged on the exterior of the home until Hank left through the back door.
The South Lake Tahoe Police Department posted about the incident on their Facebook, and included photos of Hank’s paw prints and the damage he left in his wake:
The question is, what will be done about Hank? The state agency says it’s launching a “special trapping effort” to remove Hank from Lake Tahoe. After he’s “in custody”, state officials have to decide whether Hank can be placed in a controlled habitat or, GULP, euthanized. Although they insist this is a last resort.
But The Bear League, a local nonprofit that protects ursine cuties like Hank, claims that the state agency is targeting Hank for death, and they are “frantically working to save his life by reaching out to various wildlife sanctuaries in hopes of finding him a safe home.” The Bear League says that the reason Hank loves the Tahoe Keys neighborhood is that the community has rules that forbid “unsightly” bear boxes. Bear boxes are animal-resistant garbage can enclosures in which people can safely discard food waste. Instead, residents of Tahoe Keys keep their food waste in their garages, and that’s why Hank has turned to a life of B&Es. However, the police department’s recent Facebook post mentions that residents can apply to get a bear box, so it would seem the neighborhood’s rules have changed.
Here’s the Bear League’s post:
All these neighbors need to admit that they’re purposely baiting Hank the Tank by leaving open food out in their garages. I don’t blame them; who wouldn’t wanna get an up-close glimpse of Hank’s Rubenesque beauty? He’s a plus-sized icon who puts the Alaskan salmon-scoopers of Fat Bear Week to shame!
Pics: Bear League/Facebook