Nobody’s gonna buy that a wispy 19-year-old male model is actually going to be walking around the streets of Milan, Paris, or New York wearing a 90-pound floor-length wool coat because dressing for the weather is not the look. No, these boys are out here #inthesestreets shivering just so they can show off their nipple piercings. So it was clever of Prada to sandwich waifs between two hearty slices of whole-grain men by having Kyle MacLachlan open their Fall/Winter Menswear show at Milan Fashion Week with Jeff Goldblum bringing up the rear. Not that Kyle, and especially not that Jeff doesn’t have titty hardware, but it takes wisdom, maturity, and restraint to hold one’s nipple situation close to one’s chest.
According to Page Six:
MacLachlan, 62, looked like a total pro as he made his debut for the Italian fashion show, cutting a dapper figure in a long black coat from the luxury designer’s winter collection.
He completed the look with blue satin trousers and matching gloves.
MacLachlan was joined by the likes of Jeff Goldblum, 69, “Sex Education” actor Asa Butterfield, 24, and “Love Actually” star Thomas Brodie-Sangster, 31, who led an all-star lineup of male actors.
For his part, Goldblum cut a stylish figure in an all-black ensemble featuring a fur-trimmed coat, turtleneck and pants.
Here’s Kyle looking like a wealthy Upper West Side oral surgeon who had to run out to his car to get his custom-built nitrous oxide mask out of his trunk because he has 3 hours to kill in between patients, and Jeff looking like he’s in an all-male production of Black Swan at an avant-garde theater company in Berlin.
Nice try, Jeff! We can still see that you have nipple barbells under there, even if we can’t see them with our eyes.
Pic: YouTube