Lil Uzi Vert caught one in the pink while stage-diving at the Rolling Loud music festival back in July. People reports that “fans ripped out the pink diamond he has his forehead when he dove into a crowd,” which really just proves that the only thing more embarrassing than having a ludicrously large gemstone implanted into your forehead is having it stolen from you, right between your very eyes.
The only good reason to keep your valuables on you at all times is to ensure they don’t get stolen. So this is a doubly tragic incident that everyone could have seen coming. Especially Lil Uzi Vert! Lil Uzi Vert, whose real name is Symere Bysil Woods, talked to TMZ about the incident.
How does he still have the diamond?! Was it an inside job? Where is it now? Does he keep it in the stink now, for even safer-keeping? Lil Uzi’s diamond is becoming the INTRIGUE OF THE CENTURY. Years from now there will be series of mystery novels in the style of The Moonstone by Wilkie Collins chronicling the whereabouts of Lil Uzi’s gemstone as it changes hands, foreheads, and butts, and traverses the world!
Pic: YouTube